i dont read every post above this buuuut...
openBSD or freeBSD (i would go with freeBSD) are better scalable, take hard loads without giving up and are in fact the better "workers".
for example:
back in 2001 we had a huuuge site on a suse box with a intel cpu and apache/mysql as services. after a time we found out that in the peak times the load goes up and the server gets slow as hell.
a good friend told us to use a sun box with solaris. so we tried freeBSD on solaris because my coworker worked with it since a few years.
and guess what happend? a sun box with a BSD os is freakin fast.
i try to display the results back then in a little graph here...
Linux
-----
| ********************
| *
| *
| *
| *
| *
|*
load|__________________________
time
freeBSD
-------
|
| *****
| * *****
| * ***********
| *
| *
|*
load|__________________________
time
thats in short what we found out back then... linux takes the load and stays in that high load mode. freeBSD takes the load and tries to optimize... somehow. im not good in OS things but i learned from the opinions of my coworkers and friends.
...and all those guys would say "take freeBSD and better take BSD on a SUN box and you're save for years."
same with lighttpd.
i made a similar "graph" for jan (inventor of lighttpd, german like me

):
APACHE 2
========
fast|
|
| ** *** *** *** **
| * * * ** *** ****
|*
slow|__________________________
past now
LIGHTTPD
======== * * ** * ***********
* * * * *
fast| *
| *
| *
| *
|*
slow|__________________________
past now
thing is, apache is extremly blown up, has more than a handfull of developers in the back and tries to match all possibilities...
lighttpd on the other site is startet as "how small can a webserver be"-project and has less than a handfull of coders who are not trying to blow up the code - in fact more in the other direction - how to get useless code out of the daemon...
so its not unussual that you get 20-40 requests per second with apache on a normal project and 500 and much more with lighttpd. because lighttpd has some nasty build in tricks to handle huge loads and the php/rewrite stuff.
for example php is included in a fast-cgi container. thats what ppl tell you to do with apache to get more speed out of it.
its default with lighttpd.
same with the mod_rewrite module for lighttpd and everything else...
lighttpd is what i would call the best example for "reduce to the max".
(and its pretty easy to install

)
(sorry for my horrible english hehe.)
(oh and btw. hi, i'm tobias.)